It's been a while.

I was taking cymbalta (an anti-depressant) for a year. Now since I quit taking it I find myself on an emotinal roller-coaster. I cry like a girl. And I'm angrier than I've been in a while. I don't know if it's my imagination or not but I can't help but wonder if the drug controlled all my emotions for a year and now that I quit, everything I didn't feel for a year is now coming out.
Including horniness. The last time I felt this horny was when I was pregnant with my baby and my now ex-husband refused to have any form of sex with me because I was too "fat" (I've never been what most people consider fat but since I looked anorexic when we got married it must have seemed fat to him).
What to do with this? What to do?
I signed up for Jenna on dishnetwork, masturbate almost everyday, signed up with a ladies only sex website , joined some adult googlegroups, but none of it takes the place of dick. Not my dildo, not my fingers, not Mr Shower Massage, nothing.
So what's next? And where did my fuck friend go?
Back to fantasizing, I guess.
More to cum.

Confused

Reality--I am having an identity crisis. Am I a cum-slut 'ho, which I think I might want to be? Or am I a good girl?
I want sex. I want more sex than I'm getting. I'm ready to place an ad now or something. I never thought it would be so hard just to find somebody to fuck.
I feel like those people that write into advice columns saying I want to be with someone, I'm attractive, intelligent, blah, blah, blah, but I just can't meet someone.
My problem is I'm not looking for a relationship, I think I'm looking for Mr goodbar. I need to rent that movie. I think that might be me, but doesn't she die at the end? I don't want to die, I just want to get fucked.
I have a fuck-friend, supposedly, but he's not coming thru for me. Literally.
So I have to decide do I want to go out and try to meet someone like-minded, too busy for a real relationship, not wanting to go there, but ready to fuck. And what if he's married, or has a girlfriend, should I have principles about that?
I think once I finally got some dick again after so long without it that I don't want to go back to not having it again. I was like a virgin that didn't know what she was missing. Now I remember. Oh yeah, I like it, deep, hard, fast, inside. Yeah, that's what I want. My toy doesn't do it for me anymore. Even if it does vibrate.
Maybe I'm too picky. I don't feel picky. But maybe I need to broaden my choice of men I flirt with. And get out more.
I still fantasize but not as much. I think I'm ready for the real thing now.
Zoe

Getting Some

Reality-Sorry I've been gone so long. The reason is that after three years of no sex except with myself, I'm now getting some. I've been reading books for years about focusing on your goals, creating true intentions, being clear on what you want, visualizing, etc. It's not that I didn't believe it but I never actually tried it. Seriously. Then I start this blog and lo and behold, I start getting sex. With a totally hot, sexy, stud. So far it's only been a couple of times in the backseat of the car but I'm sure there's more to come. Literally.
Wow! I guess all that visualizing, etc, really works.
However, I haven't stopped fantasizing. Why should I? So when I have a bit more time, there will be more stories to come plus a part two to In The Hills.
Keep On Coming.

PS How's that for a sign off? I'm trying to think of a good one.